there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
