Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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