he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Someone signed my nipple.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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