I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize