My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize