I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
