O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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