i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
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