Hey man sorry I got all grabby
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Randomize
