The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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