HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize