AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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