I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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