i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
