People with herpes should wear stickers.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize