Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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