The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
