Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
