Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
she peed on how many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize