dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I came so hard my ears popped.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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