Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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