problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
