Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize