I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
