Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
