it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
