Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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