Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
