'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
