if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
