I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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