he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
