so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
