I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize