After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
