Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
