Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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