"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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