Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
