Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
It was confusing and full of hummus
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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