Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
