no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
