Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
