i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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