we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
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Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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