what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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