Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
