VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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