just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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