Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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