ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
