if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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