I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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